Every wife wishes to have a loving, caring and stress-free mother-in-law, but we don’t get everything we wish for. It’s not new that some women are scared even before they meet their mother-in-laws. Probably because of all the bad stories they’ve heard and Nollywood isn’t even making it easier with the way they portray mother-in-laws.
Some women may have to deal with an overbearing mother-in-law whether they like it or not. So if this is you, how are you going to handle it? Cry, fight back or constantly quarrel with her? Or, deal with it while still giving her the respect she deserves.
The points below will likely ease the stress of having to deal with an overbearing mother in law.
Be willing to make it work
Like we said earlier, some women are scared and have bad perceptions. They build their defensive walls and create bad expectations, this will one way or the other affect the future relationship. You’ll hear some women saying they don’t care and are ready to fight ‘fire with fire’. Honestly is it worth it? Wouldn’t you rather have peace of mind? Before going into a marriage or meeting you mother-in-law, drop that mindset and go in willing to make sure you have the best relationship.
Try to understand
Every overbearing mother-in-law has her reasons for being the way she is. You may not like the reason but that’s what it is. By virtue of marriage, you’re stuck with her.Make things easier for yourself and try to understand. Some mothers are so invested in their sons and naturally see you as a threat; some may have heard something about you or probably just don’t even like where you are from. Understanding their reasons will help to make it work better.
Put yourself in her shoes
Ever heard the expression “Walk a mile in my shoes, and then judge me?” Now there’s an understanding, try being in her shoes. Assume the mother’s position, your only son who has constantly given you attention has a new woman in his life. You know the right thing to do is let him go but it’s hard considering its what has been the norm.What would you expect from a daughter-in-law? Probably want her to understand and not fight all the time or get involved with your life so there’s a feeling like you’re all on the same side. One just has to be cautious and strategic with this, which takes us to the next point.
Let her become your friend
Honestly, some of our mother-in-laws just want attention, make her your friend. Know what she likes, take her out, talk with here, call regularly and be interested in her life. Same way you’ll get back with a friend after an argument, ignore all she’s throwing at you and continue being that good friend. This will most likely work especially for mother-in-laws with just sons.
Treat her the same way you’ll treat your own mother
The moment you begin to treat them with the same love, care and respect perhaps things will come easier. As mentioned earlier, they just want attention and certainty that they are loved as well.
Our points are not backed up by a proven theory, but based on information we’ve gathered from wives that have overcome their overbearing mother-in-laws, with luck they’ll help. Every human relationship works better with good communication and understanding, so we advise you try them. Dump the negative mindset and try to make it work, you’ll have a happier married life.
Know any woman dealing with an overbearing mother-in-law? Please share this with her. Any more points to add? Share with the community in the comment section.